I have always been driven and ambitious. I’ve always known what I wanted to do with my life and what I wanted to accomplish. As such for a long time now rest has always been something of a vague concept for me. Perhaps it’s because I grew up with a single mother who I always saw working. Whether it was two jobs or making breakfast or dinner, or getting me ready for school, she was always juggling something.

Or, perhaps it’s just the nature of our capitalist society mixed with the deeply Puritanical roots of America.

Whatever the reason, for as long as I can remember, I have felt this very innate sense that I should be doing more. Rest feels lazy. Sleeping feels like a luxury. I would be lying if I denied the fact that I have been a victim of grindset culture.

But the thing is, that isn’t sustainable.
You can look at the numbers, people are burning out rapidly. It’s not healthy. The stress, the exhaustion, the lack of sleep and constant ‘grind’ is grinding all of us into a pulp.

At present, I’m currently in my second-to-last semester of my Master’s program (the penultimate semester if you will). I have this blog, my YouTube Channel/Podcast, shorts that I try to make sure go up weekly (though that’s been suffering a bit), my general writing that I’m working on as well as short stories that I’m working on specifically for this website, and trying to keep up with reading, and graphics for this website which I started from scratch and have to make for every post.

Any one of those things on their own would be a lot and yet I often find myself feeling like I’m not doing enough. Particularly when something that I’m working on isn’t directly bringing in an income, or hasn’t been for the last few years.

We have this idea that if you’re not bringing in money you’re not working. Or that the work doesn’t count unless it is directly tied to a revenue stream somehow. Even the potential for revenue doesn’t seem like enough. Having a hobby that isn’t monetized feels like a luxury, or worse, a waste of time.

Or at least that’s how we tend to treat it.
But I’m making a concerted effort to look at things differently.
Even if you’re not productive you still deserve rest.

There’s this idea that rest has to be linked with productivity or “you can sleep when you’re dead” but when all is said and done, will anyone even remember all that hard work? At the end of our lives, will we really regret the time we didn’t spend working, or will we regret the time we didn’t spend with our family, our friends, our pets, the things we love and enjoy.
It’s something I have to remind myself constantly.

You deserve rest. Whether or not you were productive.
Whether or not you accomplished your to do list.
Whether or not that rest is actively bringing in money.
Rest is necessary and it’s important.

We’re constantly told that we need to grind constantly. Keep innovating, keep pushing, keep trying new things to put ourselves out there. Work until you collapse then work some more. I’ve seen no end of the “rise and grind” memes across the internet (as I’m sure you have too), but the problem is this constant hustle culture isn’t good for us. That isn’t what life is meant to be about.

Life is for living. Life is for creating art and enjoying ourselves. Making good food and crafts, and love and poetry and beauty and music.
That’s easy to say of course, but we all have bills to pay, we have to get food on the table, and keep a roof over our heads and our family’s heads. The system, as it is now anyway, doesn’t exactly give us a lot of opportunity for rest. And that’s why we have to take it where we can.
If anything part of why rest is so important and why it’s so necessary is because it’s so counter to what we’re taught in the prevailing culture in America. It’s counter to what you’re taught from a very young age.


As writers especially, we need that time to rest and reflect. As much as there is this expectation for you to finish your book on a deadline or write as much and as fast as you can, it’s not sustainable

Here’s the thing that few people will tell you, writing takes a lot out of you mentally and emotionally. Writing is baring your soul. It can be raw, and it’s mentally taxing, and it requires you to rest and recuperate. To recharge. Not just in a superficial way either. Real, deep, and meaningful rest. Sure a bubble bath can be fun, or even a nice candle, some incense, and a face mask, but sometimes you need more than that.

Art of any kind requires rest because it requires you to recharge your creative battery. For writers that can be through reading, it can be through hobbies that are completely outside of writing (which is another post entirely) that are still creative. It can be walking in nature, or taking in art that you enjoy, or sometimes, more often than you might realize it’s just about letting yourself sleep. Nap if you can. Cuddle with your pets, spend time with family and friends.

It’s easy to fall for the grind set grift but I have a secret for you—when the ones who refused to take care of themselves and refused to rest and relax completely burn themselves out you know who’s going to fill in the gap in their absence? The ones who made sure to take care of their mental health. Those of us who worked hard to ensure that we were resting, recharging, and filling our creative battery.

I constantly have to remind myself of the importance of rest, the importance of not working too hard. Because even if you don’t quite know what your limit is, your body does and it will tell you. It will make sure you know and it’s far better not to find out the hard way because burnout, especially creative burnout can be difficult to recover from.

The good news is it’s not too late.

Here are just a few tips and tricks that I’ve learned to keep in mind (and if you have more I’d love to hear about them in the comments).

Resting doesn’t have to mean sleep.

Sleep is an important part of all of this don’t get me wrong. I may have a bit of an insomnia problem but generally speaking I do enjoy a good nap. But resting can also mean just actively stepping away from a project you’re working on. Take time for yourself that has absolutely nothing to do with writing.
If you’re anything like me, even when you’re not actively working on something, you may find you are still thinking about it, and chances are you might actually even think of ideas you otherwise wouldn’t have by taking a step back.

Put the phone down.

This is going to be unpopular but sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is being away from your phone. Social media can be incredibly draining on our mental health, even as much as it is a tool for connection. One of the things that I’ve realized is that I definitely have an addiction to my phone and my apps—without meaning to I find myself compulsively clicking on things to see if there’s a new update or something going on, even if I know there isn’t. I’ve tried turning off notifications for most of my apps and I can’t tell if that’s made things better or worse in that regard.

I recommend setting aside a weekend or two a month where you completely set aside social media. You can decide to have things that you want to autopost if you’re so inclined, but you don’t check your socials. If friends wanna talk to you they can come over or email or something. The key is disconnecting from the constant stream of input from social media and the internet.

Read

This one feels pretty self explanatory, but reading for enjoyment is good for you. It helps create a deeper sense of empathy and understanding and especially as a writer being widely read is an important skill to cultivate.

Spend time in nature/go for a walk

There’s no shortage of studies that talk about the importance of walking, especially for creativity. Steve Jobs often liked to come up with ideas while on walks. But even if you don’t want to (or can’t) walk, one thing I’ve learned recently is the importance of just spending time outside. You don’t even have to go far outside your house either.

As writers it’s so easy to become hermits and never want to leave the house. I’m something of a vampire myself and sunlight tends to burn (as does artificial overhead light for that matter) my retinas, which ultimately means I often don’t get enough vitamin D. And yet, there’s something about fresh air that can be beneficial for your well being. I find even just 10-20 minutes a few times a week just sitting on the patio can really make a difference for my mental health, especially if you can make this part of your off the phone time.

Treat Yourself

Sometimes being self indulgent is just what you need. So don’t be afraid to treat yourself a little. Incense, candles, take a bath. Go for a swim. Whatever it is that can relax you is key. This is superficial I grant you, but sometimes it’s nice to enjoy yourself (it’s about balance). I’m partial to a little iced drink from Dunkin’ myself.

Find your joy and whimsy

This might seem unrelated to the rest but I think it’s just as important, if not more so. Find things that bring you joy unrelated to your writing. Find things you enjoy that bring you whimsy and make them a big part of your life because life is too short and more importantly, it’s too easy to get bogged down in the cold harsh realities of the world, especially as a writer who often finds themselves holding a mirror up to society.
Last February we got an unexpected snow storm where I am in Texas. As someone who has really only seen snow twice in my entire life (that wasn’t in the mountains), I couldn’t help but run out in the middle of it, trying to catch snowflakes on my tongue, and spin around just trying to enjoy the quiet, chilly stillness in the air.

This summer, I’ve found myself enjoying swimming in a way that I haven’t since I was a kid.

Taking the time to find joy and whimsy in your life, whether it’s through art, dress, or just finding joy in the little things, unrelated to your work, is going to go a long way in helping you rest, relax, and recuperate.
You deserve that.